I saw a shooting star.
It streaked across the sky
Past Gemini and Pleiades.
Then came through the kitchen window
And landed in a pan of peas…
I was abducted by aliens
In nineteen ninety one,
But they didn’t take me to outer space,
They took me to Orpington…
I made a fatal error and used my identity crisis online.
Now someone else has stolen it.
That identity crisis is mine…
I saw an archangel in Lidl,
He had recently flown from on high.
He was whistling and having a nibble
Of a classic Fray Bentos steak pie…
I’m my own worst enemy.
I’m dug into a muddy trench
and at the same time I’m fifty yards away
on the other side of no-man’s land,
my finger resting gently on the trigger of a Gatling gun…
There is a strange anomaly
Playing havoc with my flowerbed.
It’s something you don’t often see,
A black hole in the garden shed…